Nutella

Hello dear stranger who probably doesn't have a clue who I am
Lets clear that up right away, its Niamh, really, yes, its me, hi, ok, let's do this thing.

I, dear friend, like Nutella.

I like it very much.

You have two valid excuses to not enjoy Nutella:

1. you are allergic to hazelnuts or chocolate

2. you are dead and do not enjoy anything

I guess you might say I am something of a chocaholic but to be honest, that is what I do. Chocolate is literally my life. Demonstration:

Nutella is lovely. It is my friend. It gives me love. It's a good conversation filler.

 

Aww, thank you Nutella. and with that, point made.

You know, I'm a bit of a foodie person, so don't be surprised if literally EVERYTHING I post is Food related. bye bye :)

BACK TO SCHOOL: time for hilarious photos

Hi - it's me again.
Yes, I know, I have no life and Niamh obviously does because her posts are actually interesting.

Wow, you're rather rude.
I mean, you could think that, but not say it.
Anyways...

Tomorrow is OFFICIALLY BACK TO SCHOOL DAY. Well, it's not the actual back to school day, because, well, that was like a whole half term ago, but it IS the return of school days after a week-long break.

So, since we're all probably feeling a bit..I don't know...deflated/horrified/depressed/sad/stressed/etc, I thought I'd post a few school-related funny photos (y'know, those ones you spend your time hunting for on Tumblr).

Sorry for the photo-heavy post, but ENJOY!

Christmas Post 1: To Do List (for under 18s)

Yay, it's me - Saffie, that is. Not Niamh. Not that she isn't awesome, but, yeah, wow. It's me. Saffie. Understood? Good. Yay. Rhyming.
...
Anyways...
Since it's officially November, it's time to, as I affectionately call it, 'get yo Christmas on' - i.e. START WEARING SANTA HATS/CHRISTMAS JUMPERS EVERYWHERE.

So now it's all merryyyyy anddddd brightttttt, take a swig of whisky/alcohol/melted chocolate/juice/whatever-you-damn-well-fancy and start ticking off my CHRISTMAS TO DO LIST:

1. Get into the Christmas attitude. Appropriate attire include; naff Christmas jumpers not socially acceptable any other time of the year; over-the-top Christmas-themed earrings that pull on your earlobes and are generally uncomfortable; stupid hats (which, might I add, can be worn throughout the year, if you are the sort of person who enjoys such things) that keep your ears warm; tinsel and other tacky decorations that really shouldn't be attached to you but somehow are. 

2. Start singing Christmas songs. EVERYWHERE. Please remember that carols are best sung - and enjoyed - when out of tune. I, for one, am a great believer in purposely singing completely off tune. Because..it's, um...more enjoyable for the listeners, or something.

3. Christmas-ify your house. If you're on a budget, I suggest taking a trip to your local budget store (Poundland, here I come) and buying  at least 5 packets of tinsel, 10 packets of baubles and a variety of tacky home decorations (I truly appreciate a good plastic Santa Claus sitting on the dining table, saying 'HO HO HO, MERRRYYYY CHRISTMASSSS' whenever his little head is pressed). Can't afford a tree? Don't worry. Use some stealthy ninja skills and steal one from your friends house. She should be too engrossed in decorating her house to notice.


3 (part II). As part of decorating your house, you may also want to decorate your family members and pets. 

4. Force your parents to buy you an advent calendar (or, if they're craft-inclined, get them to make you one and fill it with expensive gifts). THIS IS A VERY IMPORTANT STEP. DO NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, SKIP.

5. Write a Christmas List. Make sure to include your greatest wishes, such as a mansion or ten houses. Not only do these make good 'holiday laughs' for your mum or dad, but also ANNOY THEM FOR NO REASON; "You know you can't have that, so why even list it?", "What is WRONG WITH YOU?" and "WHY WOULD YOU EVEN THINK WE COULD AFFORD THIS?" are common reactions :)

6. Ready for Christmas? Nearly there. You've got one last step to go. But since I like even numbers, I'm going to count this as a step. Onwards...

7. Create some family traditions, if you don't already have them. Ideas include:

• Everyone opening one gift on Christmas Eve
• Everyone staying up until midnight
• Having the whole, extended family round on Christmas Eve/Christmas Day/Boxing Day
• Having little messages/photos in your advent calendars
• Hanging up stockings on your fireplace/cupboard/random piece of furniture
• Leaving out specific gifts/letters for Santa/Rudolph
• Baking a Christmas Cake together
• Having a Christmas Movie Marathon as a family on Christmas Eve

8. AND WE'RE DONE!!!!!!!

I hope you like this post - look out for more Christmas Posts, since IT'S BASICALLY CHRISTMAS. 

!BE EXCITED!

Cake, and the General Importance of Cake

OK, Hi! Its Niamh, yes, the annoying one -
'where's Saffie?!' I hear you cry 'who are you? go away boring person!'
- thanks.

Anyway, doodly bop, I'm gonna do a thing on cake. Cause let's face it, cake is an incredibly important aspect of modern society. I mean look at it:

See how gorgeous and incredible it is? We could not live without cake. We could not, I tell you. Here's why:

• cake understands you when you feel down and supports you
• cake listens
• cake is bad ass
• cake gives you personal space
• cake will disgust those bitches that you hate
• cake is, basically, a hot ass mess

Point taken? Good. Cake is very important and sociable and STUFF.

OK, I'm done, thank you for paying attention (ish)